Knowing What She Needs (Fiction)

He glanced up from the computer as she drifted through the door, her eyes tired and more than a little haunted. Worriedly, he crossed to her and wrapped her in his arms. He felt her shudder as he rocked her gently, but she wouldn't, or couldn't, let herself relax into his comfort. Sighing, he pressed a kiss to her hair and suggested softly "Why don't you go take a long, hot shower and we can talk about it later?" She nodded absently and made her way upstairs, treading so softly he would swear she floated.

The water was steaming hot, almost brutal, although she couldn't have said was she was punishing herself for. After a half hour, when her skin was screaming at her to stop, she turned off the water. Toweling off, she wondered how she would explain the day to her husband. It wasn't anything he hadn't heard before, that they hadn't dealt with before, but every time it happened, she walked away feeling as fragile as glass. When she was dry, she slipped into the robe hanging on the door and padded barefoot into the bedroom. Her heart skipped a beat as she glance over and saw him sitting on the bed, the light ping pong paddle in his hand. Even as her heart began to race, something inside her loosened, and shifted back into place. She crossed the room to him and let the robe fall from her shoulders, blushing slightly at his open perusal of her body. Even after 5 years of marriage, they never seemed to be tired of each other.

He smiled at her blush, and shy smile and tugged on her hand so that she would lean down to kiss him, briefly, before he guided her gently over his lap. He had learned a long time ago, when they first started dating, that when she was upset about something, the best way to help her work it out was with a long spanking. He'd stopped trying to define them. They weren't erotic, because they served a deeper need than that, but they weren't by any means disciplinary either. Shaking himself out of his trip to the past, he focused on the present. Lovingly, he rubbed his hand in circles over her bottom cheeks, calming her nerves and soothing her. When he felt her relax, he picked up the light paddle.

The first swat always made her jump, no matter than she was expecting it. Before the sting could fade, he landed a second swat to her other cheek. He kept up a steady rhythm, alternating cheeks and working his way down her bottom and after about 20 swats, she began to kick her legs a little. He paused, and rubbed her bottom for a bit, gauging whether or not she was ready to talk. He could feel the tension in her back, so he resumed the paddling. Never too hard, just enough to build a steady burn.

She could feel the burn building and could feel the stress, and the sadness welling up inside of her in proportion to the burning in her bottom. As the burn intensified, she fought back the tears that threatened to spill over.

He could feel her trembling with the effort to keep her tears at bay. "Let go, baby, just let go," he urged gently. His words, and the love behind them ripped the tears from her throat on a sob. He stopped spanking as the tears came, but she barely noticed through the pain in her heart. Carefully, he gathered her into his arms as she sobbed and brokenly told him what had happened. Her father had contacted her again that day, and as usual had demanded to know why she wasn't...more. More successful, richer, etc. As hard as she tried to please him, it was never enough. His heart broke as she cried herself to sleep in his arms, crying over a man she had loved her whole life who never seemed to love her enough in return.

When she finally fell into a deep sleep, he slipped her under the covers and slid in beside her, in case she woke again before morning. As he watched her sleep, he was humbled, as always, by her absolute faith and trust in him. He eventually drifted off to sleep, holding her close, protecting her in slumber as he did when he woke.